Father

i blame u for all of this shit..
i will never forgive you,and i will always hate you..
Girls on my age, they dont have to go to work.
They can only have to go study and enjoy their teenage world.
But me, i have to buy my own food, my own cloths..
I depend on myself to survive,
Even your wife, i give her money..
Its not that i dont want to buy her anything..
It just that... i dont think this is fair for her..not even for me..
im so ashamed of u.
Why do i have to replace your place as a father, as a leader?
You the one that should taking care of us..
You the one that should make her happy..
But look what have you done now??
You ruin my life..

They said 'he still your father, no matter what'
yes! i know that.. But no one know it well better than me,
Not even mum, not even you.
You dont know how it feels like to be like me..
To survive this cruel world by myself..alone!
You dont know how i feel everytime you buy branded things for sister..and you never bring anything for me.
You dont even remember my birthday.
You dont know how i feel everytime you beat me..The pain in my skin can be heal but not my heart..
Even so, i still tried to make you proud of me..
Then i found it.. you would be proud of me if i have a fight with guy and im win the competition.
I tried so hard, i won.. Afters, i think you will love me just like you love them..
But it wont last for a long time..
Im still your burden..


I feel so tired now,
I wanted to cry because i think that can make me feel better but that is no use..
Who going to wipe her tears if im also crying?
We dont deserve this,dad
Every time you feel down to earth, u call mum..
You tell her everything shit happen in your life..
She so strong that she can still calm you down, comfort you and make u feel better.
She can still make you smile with the sweetest dream and hopes even she lost it all because of you!


But after you won everything back,
You got everything you want,
You forget us! Just like that..
You abandoned me, you abandoned mum!
Im your cute baby girl one time ago..or maybe im just a charity award for you?
What is my fault that i dont exist in you heart?
I still cant see where am i wrong up until now..
Im no perfect that i have no ability to make you heart fly away to the moon or a cloud nine..
I dont say sweet lie things like what they did.
Only because of that,you abandoned your own child and protect other's..
And after all of this, You still want me to call you father??

i hate you now and will always be.